The Sass

Wow, guys. Just… WOW. I swear to you, my children must have secret meetings during which they pull up a spreadsheet and go over who is in charge of making me crazy that day/week/month/year.

The last three years belonged to the reigning champion of Audreying Around, Miss Audrey. But, LO, THE TIDES HAVE TURNED.

Audrey is segueing nicely into a normal, mostly sweet and awesome, periodically tantruming and always strong-willed three-year-old. It’s been pretty glorious, I have to say. I like her quite a bit.

I mean, come on. LOVE HER.

Olivia, however, has seen the opening and lunged for it. I mean, with ALL HER MIGHT. I mean, really, given the legacy she has to live up to, it’s no wonder she came out of the gate strong.

I don’t know where my mild-mannered, loving, sweet, polite preschooler went, but she’s been replaced by a pod person.

Please tell me this is a phase. It is, right? She’s going to be five in July. Here are some of her favorite  tricks:

  • Ignoring us. Like, entirely. Forever.
  • Back talk. OH, THE SASS.
  • Having the last word. (This drives me INSANE, but honestly? I’m not sure she understands what I mean about not doing this. Regardless, I hate it. Just shh. STOP TALKING.)
  • Screaming.
  • Being rude.
  • KICKING THINGS LIKE OH SAY THE BATHROOM DOOR WHICH IS CLOSED BECAUSE I AM PEEING THANK YOU VERY MUCH AND OH NO YOU DIN’T.

This is all standard issue preschooler stuff, right? And yes, we discipline her. She is becoming very familiar with her room lately. We are working on the follow-through. I know. That’s key. It’s miserable for all of us if we have to skip a planned fun event due to bad behavior, but it’s necessary. Bah. Boo.

This is a drawing of me, crossed out, because it was time to leave THE ICE CREAM PLACE.

I hope this ends soon. I miss my daughter. At least she still loves Audrey.

Shh, baby. It’s ok. I’m here.

7 thoughts on “The Sass

  1. I love this, and I hate this, because I fear this while be my life in about a year. But I am so glad to see they still love each other 🙂 I’m afraid that will never happen with my girls.

  2. Normal, yes, yes, yes. I’m just sorry that “normal” doesn’t help it suck any less. For comic relief, now when our five-year-old is disciplined (yet again) she’ll say “oh, not again” on the way to her room.

  3. Four sucks!!!!!!! BTW, 6 is having it’s challenges too. G is religious about his attitude bought/problem times- about 3 months before each birthday- but his entire 4th year was OMG! K is all about the Sass. She tries stuff but responds very nicely to the correct consequence. The key is finding the “thing”. Really incentives are always better if you can manage. Good luck!!!!

  4. OMG I feel you! This is so my life right now. And here I thought when my daughter turned 4 something magical would happen and most of her shenanigans would end. Wellllll…they’ve gotten worse. I find myself apologizing A LOT on her behalf. She, too, has become quite familiar with the inside of her bedroom (which she constantly informs me she hates because of X, Y or Z).

  5. It was 5 in our house, for all three of them. Follow through is key. The bummer is if your oldest goes through it, the other will probably follow. Then you can look knowingly at the oldest and say, “see what you taught her? Explain how this isn’t going to turn out well for her.” Then usually the next one’s phase doesn’t last as long. At least, that’s how it worked here 🙂

  6. Four is the absolute worst. At least in my family. Maddie Maddie is 7 and STILL have flashbacks to the horrors of her at 4. Sam will will be 4 in May jas is clearly an overachiever. His favorite new thing to say when admonished is “I can do whatever I want to.”

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