I hurry my kids

I’ve been seeing the viral blog post by Hands Free Mama sweep its way through Facebook with a lot of positive feedback accompanying it.

The sentiment is lovely. Stop and smell the roses. Savor life. Take your time and enjoy the sno-cone. Hey, I like frosty treats as much as the next guy, but, well, ok. I’m just going to put it out there…

Sometimes children need to be hurried. Wait. Let me rephrase that so as not to alienate 90 percent of our readership. My children need to be hurried sometimes. Olivia, in particular. She, like the daughter of Hands Free Mama, is a noticer. She takes her sweet time on everything. And I mean everything.

Hey Mom, this gate is made of four triangles. Let's relax and look at it even though we still have a three hour car ride to Vermont!
Hey Mom, this gate is made of four triangles. Let’s relax and look at it even though we still have a three hour car ride to Vermont!

There are times, like when she’s enjoying a snack crumb by crumb, that I just sit and watch her. Happily. But, there are other times – every weekday morning – when we have a schedule to keep. I have a job. My husband has a job. She has school. We need to be on time for these things.

So yes, I regularly say things like, “Hurry up and put your shoes on. Put your shoes on. Liv, shoes. Let’s go. Time for shoes. Focus. Olivia. SHOES!” or things like, “Brush your teeth. Please hurry and get your teeth brushed. We’re going to be late. We ARE late. BRUSH YOUR TEETH. TEEEEEETH!!!!” I mean come on. They are small teeth. It should NOT TAKE AN HOUR.

I cannot afford the luxury of giving her more time and I’m not going to wake her up extra early when she’d rather (and I prefer her to) get a bit more sleep.

And there’s value in teaching children to respect the time of others. She just can’t live her life without regard for others. We can’t be 20 minutes late for a 25 minute swim lesson because then not only does she miss the lesson, but her sister misses it and there are only nine classes and sure, I have money to throw away, PLEASE, TAKE YOUR TIME WALKING TO THE CAR.

I want to say to the parents of noticers who now feel like shit because they’ve been ruining the child by telling them to OMG just wipe and pull up your freaking UNDERWEAR ALREADY – it’s ok. There is a time to say eff it and go with the flow and there is a time to get in the carseat and buckle it because there are nine people waiting for us to go into a movie and now everyone will miss the beginning because you had to think about which way to cross your ankles before climbing into the car.

Good grief, child. HURRY UP.

11 thoughts on “I hurry my kids

  1. i’m an admitted hurrier. dude, we have to get to school on time, work on time, and drs appointments on time. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! but, on the weekends, Jake can totally feel free to take his sweet time! There must be a balance struck, because in life, you do need to be on time for certain things!

  2. Ha! I also don’t have a ‘noticer’ (that Im aware of yet) and I myself am one of those always-late ppl (and I hate it). But even still Ive rolled my eyes at that meme going around. Yes, it is important to give your kids opportunities to stop and smell the roses – and something Ive been trying to give my Henry – but sometimes you need to hurry up to get somewhere remotely CLOSE to on time. Gotta teach these tiny dictators to live in civilized society at some point right??

  3. LOL! I don’t have any “noticers” as of yet, at least I haven’t “noticed” that yet. But I do have twin 2 year old toddlers and me and my husband work outside of the home and my kids love to sleep so I feel like I am always rushing them in the morning. I hate having to rush and nag them to “bring mommy your shoes.” Its crazy making for all of us, however, I like you, think it is very important to teach your children to respect others people time. Love this.

  4. I love this!!!! I also have a “noticer” (ahem, Nate…) which yes, is wonderful, sometimes. But there are times when I hear the words “Have you ever noticed thaaaaat….” come out of his mouth and I cry inside. I love him to pieces, but for the love of God, please, please don’t feel you need to show me a straw wrapper on the floor of the car and try to recollect which flavor of milkshake that particular straw was used for…

  5. This is so true! How is it that a child can move so slow?? I mean, how is it humanly possible? I feel like I’m in a comedy routine most days and no one told me!

  6. Ha! Love it. And true — I read the post, it resonated with me and I am trying to be more cognizant of rushing her when the situation doesn’t need to be rushed…but there ARE times when dawdling causes problems and just GO for the love of God, child! 🙂

Share Some Comment Love

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s