Mommy’s Pet Peeves

I am going through an outlook-on-life transition. I acknowledge that I’m a work in progress as it relates to my own self and my parenting. I’ve been really focusing on adopting the mindfulness approach to everything and it’s coming slowly.

I’m trying to focus on the important things and block out the silly ones. One thing I’d like to accomplish is to not let things ruin my day. I don’t want to get riled up or frustrated with things so easily.

I keep thinking about the Dalai Lama and something he said about letting negativity pass by you like the wind. Let it go around you and be gone.

So, before I completely throw myself into this “not letting anything effect me” period of growth, I have to get a few things off my chest as a mom.

I have certain pet peeves about people in public. Maybe I never noticed before, maybe I’ve even been guilty of a few myself (before motherhood), but they bug me now. I just wish I could sometimes force people to be a little more considerate, or think before they do something. We’ve all done dumb things and I’m sure we’ve all been guilty of being inconsiderate, but I just want people to pay more attention to the world around them, especially when that little world involves children.

Mommy’s Pet Peeves:

  1. People who park way too close to the side doors of the minivan. Yes, I realize that the doors slide open rather than open wide, but don’t be bent out of shape if I accidentally whack your side mirror with my 25 lb infant carrier. Little kids come with “stuff” and the “stuff” takes up space.
  2. People who use the elevator at the mall when they don’t need to. There is one elevator in the middle of our local mall. It’s about 50 yards from a set of escalators in the food court. I strongly believe that the elevator should be for people who cannot use the escalators, i.e. those in wheelchairs, those with walkers, moms with strollers, etc. I get a little irritated when 7 able-bodied teenage girls pile into the elevator all the while texting on their cell phones (to each other, I’m sure) as 2-3 moms with strollers have to wait for the next one.
  3. Single diners at a seat-yourself restaurant who take one of the last remaining tables for 4+ while there are a plethora of 2-top tables open. Especially when there are a few families of 3+ walking in the door. I watched a man sit at a 4-topper at Five Guys last week enjoying his meal while a family of 4 was trying to move a few double tables and chairs around so they could all sit together. He watched them but barely even blinked.
  4. People who park in the “Expectant Mom” or “Parents with Newborns” spots at the mall that don’t have any evidence of a car seat in their vehicle. Now, I never actually parked in those spots when I was entitled to, but since those spots do exist, I would think that an able-bodied person should walk a few more steps than say, an 8-month pregnant mom with twins or a frazzled mom with a toddler and a newborn. Just saying.  (And don’t even get me started about people who park in Handicapped spots that have absolutely no business doing so)
  5. The perfect mothers who huff, mumble something or look at you disapprovingly in public when your child does something imperfect or when you don’t have the perfect textbook parenting response ready at the moment. We all know we’re not perfect at this parenting thing, right? And even some of the best behaved children can be total pains at certain moments. Of course, we are supposed to not drag our child places when we know they are tired. In a perfect world, all errands would be run by happy moms and well-rested, well-prepped and well-behaved children who don’t need to be bribed (ahem, I meant “positive reinforcement rewarded”) with anything. Not sure if I’ve ever had that experience, personally. But I do not need the glares of other mothers when I’m trying to get through our task without permanent emotional scarring (no, I’m not spanking my child or having ineffectively lame negotiations). My kids are the ones that don’t stay still. I’m working on it. Don’t huff at me unless you’ve raised the most perfect child ever who has just written an award-winning book about the perfect parenting he was raised with.  (Bonus points: count the number of times I said “perfect” in this paragraph)
  6. People who curse like crazy in public. Sometimes they are walking around the mall on their cell phones YELLING “and then that effing bitch said…” or teenagers that continuously pose for selfies in the food court while flicking off the camera (I’m not sure why this is so cool). I don’t think that behavior is really necessary anyway, but at least be somewhat aware of the 3 and 6 year olds sitting a table away from you.
  7. People who need to drive 40 mph through parking lots. And through condo complexes. Note: if you fly through my condo complex and catch air over the speed bumps while my kids and I are outside, I will make quick note of the pizza sign on your roof and call your boss quicker than you can say “hold the anchovies”. I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again. True story.

Go ahead, call me Snarky. I’m sure I’m not the only mom with pet peeves.

Please feel free to share some of your own. I promise not to judge.

11 thoughts on “Mommy’s Pet Peeves

  1. Oh, I love pet peeves. The very fact that I have named something a pet peeve is usually an implicit acknowledgment within myself that I am being nitpicky and that the issue is probably more with me than it is with the other person, but that I want to acknowledge my annoyance rather than let it fester into unhealthy resentment at the world.

    I have a few – taking up multiple parking spots in a busy lot; walking between my child and me in a busy store or amusement park; nearly all advertising directed at kids irritates me; any attempt by a stranger to discipline my children; people who call but don’t leave a message and still expect a call back; the constant bombardment of requests for money or volunteering by the PTO; and I could go on and on.

    But as to your last issue, speeding in parking lots or down my road is far more than a pet peeve, at least for me. It absolutely enrages me, and unlike other things people do that bother me, I feel 100% justified that this is their problem, not mine. Unless you are an ambulance, there is no justification for speeding through any area where pedestrians are common. It is putting lives at risk for absolutely no reason. My son was hit by a car when he was three, and THANK GOD, the person was not speeding. Had they been, he could have been seriously injured. Although I feel like I have turned into my grandfather who throughout my childhood constantly yelled at speeders, I embrace it. They are in the wrong, and this is not a gray area at all! Although the highway might be a different story, I have also learned not to be a hypocrite on this. I drive slowly and carefully through parking lots and residential neighborhoods without fail. So, yeah, forgive my rant.

  2. Stuff like this bothered me even before I had kids. I hate that people are so inconsiderate. Now that I do have kids, I try to tamp down my anger about stuff like this but make it a point to teach my kids how to be considerate of others.

  3. I LOVE that you’re going through an “outlook-on-life transition”! That is so awesome (and I see so many people starting to do this!). I also think it’s great that you got all of this off your chest, ’cause burying it won’t work. We all have to embrace our dark side. 😉 I’m absolutely sure that as you find more inner peace, the world around you will reflect it too. Keep this list and look back on it in a year ~ that would be an interesting experiment! ♥

  4. How about when you’re struggling to fit through the door of _________(Starbucks, dry cleaner, fill in your own…) with your Buick…I mean…double stroller and NO ONE HELPS YOU WITH THE DOOR! Even better, they wait behind you tsking for you to hurry up. Yah, so sorry. Let me hurry it up for you.

    My other huge pet peeve: Why, why, WHY must they put the child-height rack of toy cars at the CVS pharmacy pick-up line? Without fail, both of my kids will beeline for it, and begin the incessant, “Can I have this? This car? This mine? Mommy, we buy this? Take this home?” Thanks, CVS. (I’ve yet to cave….YET)

  5. Well, since I know we have a mutual Dalai Lama love I’m going to throw a quote at you, “Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can.” I can tell that you are feeling very frustrated by your pet peeves. What if you change your mind about them? I’ve been trying to remind myself that when people act in ways that are inconsiderate, they clearly aren’t happy and when I think about wanting them to be happy I have more space in my heart to feel compassion towards them. It’s hard at first and I meditate a lot about this stuff but we really can change the way we think about stuff like this. I also agree with your first point about trying to not let the actions of others impact our own inner peace. I swear that is the freaking key to happiness. It’s so hard though. But it IS possible! I’m getting better at it but still have a ways to go.

  6. How funny you should write this. I had jotted down a list like this a few weeks ago thinking about turning it to a blog post. I agree with all of yours! Here are two of my favorites from the list I had:
    1)When parents with only 1 child use the double shopping carts or the obnoxiously large little car shopping carts. I have two kids, one of which can’t walk on his own and the other who walks where ever he pleases. Having a double cart makes my shopping trip much more sane. I’m sure other mother’s of multiple kids would agree.
    2)When other parent’s at the daycare or school send their kid to school with an obvious illness. (Not talking sniffles.) I understand it isn’t easy to take the day off every time you kid is sick (trust me…my husband and I are both in jobs that have pretty strict attendance policies). But there are kids who have compromised immune systems out there that a slight fever could be potentially life threatening (like to my youngest). Plus, no one wants to spend their weekend cleaning up puke. If my kids don’t look like themselves in the morning they don’t go to daycare.

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