Last week I was working as I always do when my iPhone received an email from the CEO of our company.

The dreaded “Layoffs are coming” email.

This email was filled with tons of proper company jargon that makes it seem not as bad as it can be which is of course complete crap. The worst part of this email is that we will not find out who is being let go until two and a half weeks.

You heard right: TWO AND A HALF WEEKS!

Seriously you are letting us know and think about possibly losing our jobs for more than two weeks? Doesn’t that seem crazy? I do not understand the logic behind this? Are you trying to give people anxiety until dooms day.

It makes me feel like I am dating an asshole guy who is not that into me. You know the one who you really like, but only calls when he is drunk. He never tells you he doesn’t want to be with you and keeps you strung along.  So you wait for a call, but it never comes. ALRIGHT DOUCHEBAG I am a big girl, just tell me you do not like me so I can move on.


That is what is going on here. My job is the jerk and I am waiting around to see if he likes me. The big problem is I have a huge crush on my job, boss, and work. But if my company doesn’t like me then just tell me so I can move on.

I am lucky to have a diverse background and know I will land on my feet but the idea of doing something else gets me bummed out.

So I sit here and hope for the best, but expect the worst.  I have started to put feelers out but feel like I am in a tough place. I do not want to leave my company if I do not get laid off but I also know how long it takes for Corporate America to hire a person.  What would you do?

For now I am freshening my resume up and searching the Internet, but besides that I guess I will just wait to see if the jerk likes me enough to keep me around.

5 thoughts on “Layoffs?

  1. Ugh…seriously suck-town U.S.A. I hope for the ABSOLUTE BEST outcome for you because you are freakin’ fantastic. Even though this is icky news I did appreciate the potty-humor in your post…as always. Love you.

  2. Very brave post. I hope it works out for you. I wonder what is worse, getting too much advance notice, or getting zero notice and absolutely no time to prepare whatsoever. It probably depends on individual circumstances. Not fun either way. I survived at least one layoff, that I was aware of, back at the beginning of my career … working for the State (NJ, not CT). That’s when I realized that even government jobs are not safe … no one is safe … and this was back in 2005 or 2006, from what I recall, before the recession.

  3. Ugh, I’m sorry! I’ve been in this position before and the second I got word layoffs were coming, I started the job search. I wasn’t desperate, but I updated my resume and sent it to a couple companies I was interested in. By the time I received the official word, I already had 2 offers from other places. I’m a girl that likes to have a lot of options and always the upper hand, but in my mind why not? It never hurts to see what is out there and what you are “worth” to the job market. Best of luck!!

  4. Sorry to hear the bad news. Unfortunately I have been in your shoes to many times the last few years and with one of the rounds of layoffs we were told about 6 months out (yes that’s correct 6 months) that large numbers of layoffs were coming but keep working until that day comes. During the 6 months time we would get word that it would be happening one week, that week would come and they would tell us “We are not ready yet, keep working”. This happened a handful of times, once while I was on my honeymoon during this 6 month period and I had to leave a contact number in cause they did it while I was gone. When the layoffs finally did occur, we found out that day first through the news and then emails started coming in from HR, if you got an email sometime that day you were being let go, I’d you didn’t get an email by 3pm you were safe and had to report for a meeting at 4pm. Yes, it seemed like the most craziest system and let’s just say a lot of people were hoping to be let go after those 6 months of basically working their butts off not knowing what the next day will bring. Biggest thing we all learned from it, they never care about the individual, you are only a number to them.
    Keep your head up high and pray for the best.

  5. Sorry you have to go through this. You are hardworking and smart so your company would be crazy to let you go. I am rooting for you and wishing you the best 🙂

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