why? Why? WHY?

My daughter (who I have lovingly nicknamed “Miss Independent” and “Little Miss Bossy Pants” due to her desire to not only do everything herself, but also tell everyone else what do as well) has found a word that has really tickled her fancy. Three little letters strung together that sometimes make me want to scream “BECAUSE I SAID SO!!!” Yes, W-H-Y has become the bane of my existence.


Don’t get me wrong, I am thrilled that she is starting to try to continue conversations, make connections, develop psychologically. But I find myself challenged trying to (A) come up with an answer to a question that I really want to just reply with “Seriously?” or “How am I supposed to know?” or (B) keep my cool after the sixth “Why?” in the span of 30 seconds. I’ll paint you a little picture:

It’s 7:00 in the morning and I’m driving both my girls to daycare. I have yet to have my first sip of caffeine, when it begins…

Caroline: “Where we goin’?”

Me: “To Kimmy’s house silly goose!” (She’s very used to this weekday routine!)

Caroline: “Why?”

Me: “Because Mommy and Daddy have to go to work.”

Caroline: “Why?”

Me: “Because that’s what grown-ups do.”

Caroline: “Why?”

Me: “So we can buy things like food and clothes.”

Caroline: “Why”


Yeahhhh, not one of my proudest moments. We started off in the right direction but I definitely started losing my patience towards the end. I’ll admit, there have been instances where I’ve simply stated  “I don’t know,” or “Because I said so,” or even just tried changing the subject altogether. I am now making a conscious decision to practice more patience and to let her use that word …(gulp)… “WHY” as much as she wants. Who am I to stand in the way of her getting the answers she feels she needs? I want her to grow up understanding that it is OK to ask why. After all, we would live in a pretty sad society if no one ever asked the question “Why?”  What if Rosa Parks never asked “Why can’t I sit in the front of the bus instead of the back?”  What if the Wright brothers never asked “Why can’t we fly?”

So while this word is thrown at me left and right, night and day, I’m going to use it as an opportunity to practice patience and I’m going to:

"I am a patient, loving mother"... Is it working yet???
“I am a patient, loving mother”… Is it working yet???



6 thoughts on “why? Why? WHY?

  1. I feel ya! My almost three year old doesn’t do the why thing, but his 16 month old sister says whats that to everything!!!

  2. I hear ya, Sister! I, too, do what Jen says and ask THEM what they think….’cause frankly, I don’t have a clue most of the time. Great post!

  3. I agree with Jen on asking “Why do you think so?”. My girl gets so mad at me when I tell her I don’t know. She has to learn at some point that I’m not perfect, that there are just some things Mommy doesn’t know, right? =) I just keep breathing and trying to answer. When that fails, I divert: “Look over there! I think I just saw Barbie!”…”Why?”

  4. Ha! Love Jen’s response. I also love the photo you used, let’s all keep reminding ourselves we are patient, loving mothers ;-P

  5. Ha ha, Carly, we’re through this phase with both our boys, thankfully. It DOES end. I found that it helped me to sometimes say back to them, “Why do YOU think?” Many times I think they know the answers or can figure them out quickly, it’s just easier to ask us and we fall for it. Other times I just took it as a compliment that they think I am omniscient. 😛

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